A Message from Todd’s Inner Critic

orange-smiley-face-pvBy Todd

Dude, you’re my number-one homie. I’ma shoot you straight because no one else has the balls to. (Plus, I’m drumpk from all that Jim Beam you just guzzled.)

Todd, bro, you need to give up this whole (does finger-quotes)

“I’m so cool, I’m so ironic,” schtick.

Why should anyone read your words? What’s so special about your words? Bro, you like stoner movies and reality television – what makes you think you’re a writer?

—Wait, is that a tear I see? Don’t cry, bro. You know I love you man!

/end Todd’s hopes and dreams.

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8 thoughts on “A Message from Todd’s Inner Critic

  1. Dear Todd,
    Even when you’re being critical, you’re being authentic. You made me cry. Please, don’t listen to this douche. He should know better. You just let me know any time you need a counter balance. I’ll take that guy on!

    Sincerely,
    Jacki Fangirl Perrette

    Liked by 2 people

  2. I mean, You are right and wrong. You are right in your inner core but not in your outer shell since I do not beilieve that you are. Have a drink on me – I am! and it’s 4 o’clock in the afternoon!

    Like

  3. Ohohoho 😀 what a superbly droll commentary. Your inner critic’s a real dick though, Todd. I think you ought to consider slapping him around a bit, for his own good. I mean, clearly he knows not of what he speaks!

    Liked by 3 people

  4. We’ve all got one of these voices wittering away inside – do you think they’re all in cahoots? That they get together, sitting around a table in some scummy bar, dreaming up new ways to torture their ‘outer writer’?

    Liked by 1 person

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