My Grandfather and Me

By Stephen Lodge

My Grandfather and I were relaxing at The Haunted Poacher.

“I remember coming in here with your Dad after you scored that winning goal for Northhouses in that local Cup Final,” he said. “What a goal. But that was you. You’d peaked. You’ve done crap all since. Not like that mate of yours, Eric Pollock. He married that lass, Irma, you were both chasing. He’s a lawyer, Labour MP for Northouses, Hilandale, Paradoxham and Otters Hatch. He’s on the up and up, unlike you. Last I heard they had eight kids. Eight.”

“Wow,” I said. “That’s a lot of Pollocks.”